Beginning and Ending with Light©
A Kavanah for the end of Passover 2020/5780
As we come to the end of Passover, a different Passover than any of us could have imagined, I wanted to reflect on how the holiday began; with light.
We begin every holiday and Shabbat with the lighting of candles, but the journey of Passover actually begins the night before Yom Tov as we search for the hametz during the Bedikat Hametz ritual. We stand together as households in a dark home, searching for the hidden hametz in our homes, but we are not alone, and we are not in complete darkness. Our Bedikat Hametz rituals in our home are joyous and happy times, with a lot of laughter. I hide the pieces of hametz around our house, and then our family gathers together, anxiously anticipating the search, as all the lights in the house are turned off. I give our children a list of hints as to where they could be found, we say the blessing together, and a fun game of ‘hide and seek’ for hametz ensues. Smiles are across our faces as we search; not only do we have the joy of the moment, but our path is lit with a flame with brings us a certain type of joy and reassurance. It is the opposite experience the Egyptians had before Bnai Israel was set free. During the ninth plague, the Egyptians could not see one another because they were in darkness. The commentators note that the Egyptians could light candles, but it made no difference because their darkness was much deeper than visual; it was an emotional and spiritual darkness. But, as the Torah says, the Israelites enjoyed light in their dwellings - אוֹר בְּמוֹשְׁבֹתָם.
This is the light that we enjoy, the light that begins the holiday of Passover before it actually begins. Rabbi Ya’akov Leiner of Izbica (1818-1878) commented on the peculiar practice of searching for hametz the night before Passover. He asks a valid question: why not search for hametz during the morning of Erev Passover when we have the light of day to help us? He explains that the first step in preparing for the Seder is finding out who we really are: where is our place in the world, and what we have been placed in the world to repair? Now, in this unredeemed world, he explains, we suffer because we don’t know what we need to repair. But, in the future time of redemption, G!d will show us that even when we were in the dark, we were fulfilling a divine plan. In seeking out leaven by candlelight, we are, both literally and metaphorically, giving ourselves a glimmer of light amidst the darkness, in that the light that is used for the search reminds us that we already have the direction we seek.
I found this commentary to be especially prescient during the seemingly unprecedented times we are living in as we shelter in our homes due to Covid-19. We are physically cut off from each other; the flame of the soul is now replaced with the flicker of a screen. It is far from perfect, but at least we have the benefit of being close with others in some way. And yet, we search for that flame during this holiday. Our holiday ends with the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel. We read the Song at the Sea on the seventh day of Passover, when our ancestors, being chased by the Egyptian army, walked through the Sea of Reeds, split by G!d. When confronted with the darkness of the sea and the potential of annihilation from the Egyptian forces, G!d showed our ancestors the light in the form of a new path to freedom.
Before we begin the final night of Passover, many light a yahrtzeit candle, a candle that commemorates the loss of a treasured loved one. And we remember what they went through - how they persevered - it’s a reminder to us - we’ve been here before, and the proof is our very lives. We are here because they went through the darkness with the light of G!d and their ancestors. And so we do the same not just for ourselves, but for our descendants.
We begin Passover with light, and we end with light. Throughout this Pesach and for the weeks before, I have seen light from all of you. I have heard of stories of incredible kindness as congregants have been reaching out to one another, helping people with groceries or just a chat. Congregants have delivered food to the food insecure, and performed wellness checks. We have congregants on the front lines of Covid-19 in the medical profession, and our congregants are supporting them in the ways we can. There is so much light that has come out of these days - may they continue to light our path as we complete our journey from slavery to freedom and redemption.
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